I am still up at this time because I am revising my French for tutorial the next day. It's terrifying to go unprepared.
I have this SUPER strict French tutor who's SUPER anal about punctuality, and SUPER particular about us getting our French stuff right.
If we say something wrongly, she'll go "tsk tsk..." with a really mean face.

Besides revising French, I'm still up because I'm checking my list of invitees for my birthday.
Due to space constraint, I'm not inviting my jc friends :( :( :(
Though I really want all of you to come (I really mean it), I just don't have enough space at that venue :(
I'm quite disappointed, but sometimes, cruel decisions have to be made just like that.

****

My friends are, one by one, leaving Singapore for exchange, for studies, for work...
And they're coming back only after quite some time. So sad.

Char - Hong Kong, back in December
Yue - Grenoble, France; back in January 2009
Pris - Perth; back in November
Esther - London; back in October

Why am I still stuck here in Singapore???

This is a really fab blog my friends have set up for the Board Games Day in my church.
I'm actually quite excited about it because there'll be prizes to be won!!

Games include Ticket to Ride, Family Business, Saboteur, Scotland Yard, Citadels, Ugly Dolls... Oh yay!
Finger food will be served too.

Check them out at http://rymbogame.blogspot.com/
(click on the tabs like "event", "relax", "blog.blog" to navigate through the webpage)

Date: 30th August 08 (Sat)
Place: Renewal Centre
Time: 10am - 3pm
Admission fee: FREE!

So my friends, I invite all of you to come down!
Please call me or message me to rsvp.
Lilian, Michelle, Ching, Nise (get Gerard too :P), Van, ASK, Qunbao... come on down and play, FOR FREE. hee.

Embarrassing moments - we always have them. They make you want to shoot up into the sky and disappear, just like Nathan Petrelli.
You would probably want close your eyes and hope that if you can't see others, they probably can't see you too.

I had mine recently, which I thought was pretty horrid.

Because I just got a new handphone (it was a gift), I was still uncertain about the features. So, as I was messaging a friend, I was so engrossed that I failed to see where I was going.
In the end, I knocked onto the glass pane as I was entering J8's Coffee Bean! I was alone!

..... This. Is. So. EMBARRASSING.

That uncle who was walking beside me gave me a "wah-you-so-suay-ah/what's wrong-with-you" look, making me feel like a downright idiot.
The people inside Coffee Bean witnessed this silly act too.
So the best thing to do is to give a "aiyo-careless-me" smile and shake your head a bit to express disapproval.

And that was what I did.
Sigh.

****
Okay, my birthday is approaching in about a couple of weeks time. I shall come up with a wishlist.

1) Barbie doll and Ken doll
2) Polly Pocket
3) PSP

Oh oh.. sorry, I forgot that I'm old. Being 21 is like.. It's like. Yea, OLD.
So I shall come up with a wishlist that would reflect my "old-ness".

1) A solid cuff watch. A good one can also be a stylish versatile accessory for the hand.
2) A big haversack (about 40 litres) from Deuter. So I can take it for mission trips and other future backpacking trips I foresee myself having.
3) Capitaland shopping vouchers
4) A Creative MP4 player. Sorry hor, I'm very anti-iPod.
5) Papercrafts/Scrapbooking kit. I like to make cards you see... I don't need any scrapbook album. Just need the pretty papers and the stuff.
6) Fragrance - Davidoff Coolwater Woman or Clinique Happy to Be. Please don't buy from Lucky Plaza. I really don't believe in them anymore.
7) A handphone (and I already got it early as a birthday gift. Thanks sis. You know who you are ;) so this is in the list just for fun!)
8) A camera
9) Money also can. Kaa-chhiiinnnggg. Haaa.
10) Some pleasant surprises also CAN.

Please inform me if you want to get any of the above for me. I don't want to end up with two big haversacks ;)

This morning, I was playing the piano for my church service.
If you think I am going to lament about wild butterflies in my stomach I got whilst I play the piano, well, you are only 20% right.
I am going to talk about something much more awesome.

Yep, I was nervous, right to the core. Every slipped note on the ivories was so ugly to me.
And when I am playing with the best musicians in church, I was so afraid my less-than-average playing would jeopardise them.
Funny how God always use my role as a pianist to make me desperate to rely solely on Him.
Sometimes, I don't know how I made it through but somehow I always get to the end.

But today's ending song for 2nd Service was amazingly surreal to me. It was as if His fire came down on our sanctuary.
The whole worship band was all poised for the ending song.

As we were playing, our Senior Pastor started roaring. Yes, a loud growl, almost a roar, as if rallying for liberation. He was just like a liberated lion.

This rallying cry was powerful. I could feel the surge of determination deep in my heart as I played on and the vocalists sang. The roar of victory by our Senior Pastor was so deafening to Hades!

At the end of it, when the music stopped, people were hugging each other, tears of joy and thankgiving were aplenty, and I survived my piano duty for Sunday.


Ahhh... it was beautiful and so, so peaceful.

Because Singapore is so small...

1) Because Singapore is so small, we can't find enough enthusiastic people to perform for our national day parade, unlike the Beijing Olympics opening ceremony. If you look at the scale of their performance for the Opening, you'll be blown away!

For Singapore, we even have to resort to getting spectators, yes, spectators of the NDP (at the Padang) to do a formation as part of the programme. -_-"

2) Because Singapore is so small, we don't have a huge pool of people to pick to nurture as sports talents. No Michael Phelps (He is so amazing I think God created him to inspire the world).
No Yao Ming.
So we import.

But you may say, hey Esther, don't be narrow-minded. The world is our home. It doesn't matter where the athletes are born, as long as they are willing to fight for Singapore.

But let's face it, in our globalised world, contradictary to popular claims, boundaries matter so much more. Afraid to lose our identity to the ever-changing globalised culture, many are scrambling to demarcate ourselves; to be different. We want so much to protect our identity as a Singaporean (or at least for me).

So does Li Jiawei or Tao Li know how is it like to take the old, non-air-conditioned SBS bus, with wooden seats?
Or to brush their small, milk teeth beside the drain during primary school?
Or experienced the pressure of PSLE?

And that's what being a Singaporean is about - having gone through the history of everyday life, right in the land we call Singapore.

Despite this being said, I have to admit, I'm still proud that Tao Li got into the finals of the Olympics, especially when Singapore's name was mentioned.

*cue Majulah Singapura*

3) Because Singapore is so small, I managed to get acquainted with my primary school classmate once again, through my uni friends. He has been made famous (or maybe infamous... Hmm.) for his performance during our Primary Six post-PSLE class concert as Doraemon, prancing around outside the canteen with his Doraemon towel. Just imagine.

He really was comical and entertaining, and still is now.
I was laughing so hard at his LAME quips during our recent dim sum buffet outing (the dim sum buffet was blah, quite a letdown... So guys, don't go to River City Restaurant at Peninsula Excelsior Hotel for dim sum okay!).

Still the joker, aren't you, Qun Bao?

What's worse than being sunburnt?

Answer: Being unevenly sunburnt.
And that's what happened to me after my outing with my Sec 3 cell to Sentosa just earlier this morning/afternoon.
Blame it on my uneven slathering of sunblock. SIGH.
Now I have patches of sunburnt redness. Yucks.

Still, I like our outing today (although I had to stop them umpteen times from mercilessly teasing one another. Sometimes I really don't what to do with them...).
I'm also glad I got to catch up with Minmin about her (happening) school life while on our way to church for 2040 service. It was a good, girlie session of chatting :)

***

Just this Thursday, I discovered something fun to do at Bugis' TCC boutique. I'm going to gush about this pretty place.
The ambience there is perfect. The decorations are quaint and classy, almost French-like. Love the chandeliers that are hanging all over the place (see below).

Okay, so this is what I did, together with Yue just this Thursday evening at the boutique.



Skyped with Pris who's in Perth! It's soooo fun! We were showing off our TCC tiramisu to her and she, her homecooked sweet potato soup to us via webcam. Haha! If you notice, my face and Yue's face are down there, at the right hand corner, below Pris.
We did some silly things.
I love Skype!

I love being an undergraduate.

Today's my first day in school, as a Year 3. It's great fun to see all my course mates and friends once again! The days of studying are here but I feel more determined this semester to make my grades work this time round.

There's an interesting phenomenon, which I'm not sure if it is applicable to other faculties.
After our short 3 months break, one can always spot new looks on some course mates.
It's like an unspoken rule. For a brand new semester, you see new wardrobes and new hairstyles on some your course mates. It's like, you have to dress nicer already.

But whichever way, I enjoy the fashion parade!

NTU is teeming with life when I stepped in.
And I feel a surge of enthusiasm for lectures and tutorials, after a long long break.
This semester, I'm taking French and Public Administration for my general electives! Can't wait!

Many rave about Heath Ledger in his role as psychotic murderer, The Joker in The Dark Knight.
I caught this flick with Chin Chean, Suks and Sarah just this Friday, and even though I didn't like the ending (the hero didn't win. BOO.), it left me with many thoughts.

Well, his acting was pretty laudable (how did he lick his lips so hauntingly?).
But I believe it was Heath Ledger's death that lended the weight to his portrayal.

We all know he's dead, but here we are, seeing him on big screen, as if he's alive. This, in my opinion, is frightening enough. It really contradicts with our sense of reality.

Then again, there's another kind of fear - the poignant fear of not seeing him ever again.
This is his last art.
So, it's the fear of not being able to see him act like that again.
It grips you hard.

Of course, the make-up helps too. With make-up like Marilyn Manson, anyone can scare the daylights out of me.

P/S: By the way, if you don't know who Marilyn Manson is, go ahead and google him, at your own risk of suffering bad eyesores.
No, he's not a porn star. He's a satanic, metal rocker with thick layers of disturbing goth make-up.

With all the attention on The Joker, I think Christian Bale is not bad too. I like his chiselled, brooding face. All serious, but still charming.

It's like organising a wedding.

Putting my 21st birthday party together is milking dry my brain juice and giving me unneccesary stress.
First of all, the who-to-invite segment.

I don't plan to invite a lot of people; only close friends and family.

Another thing. I don't want to blow my budget (or my parents' budget) by inviting EVERYONE (even though I very much want to... sob sob). It doesn't help that my extended family is already like 25++ people.
Church friends (plentytoomanyalotcountless)+jc friends (10?)+university friends (about 8?)+family (25+) = about 60 people
WAAAAHH

Tell me what to do... where to find such a big place??!!
And catering for 60+ people...

Ya, congratulations Esther.

Should I just call it off?

I think maybe I should, and just have a good one with my extended family.
But the sociable, friendly side of me tells me that "Oh, but it's not as fun if your friends are not coming..."

Right. Brilliant.
So now what?

"In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight. " - Proverbs 3:6

My good Lord, HELP!!!