Yesterday's Teens Service made me realise how old I actually am already.

As usual, our secondary school boys were really unresponsive during Teens Service
Pastor JH (to the four secondary school boys - Isaac, Jovi, Wei Lun and Amos): Wah, no response from you all? Our four boys. F4 eh?
The secondary school boys: .....?
Me: F4's not their generation!
Pastor JH: Ok, you all are Fahrenheit?

After a while...
Isabel (a 12 year-old young lady): What's F4?
Me: Do you know 流星花园?
Isabel: Huh.. What's that?
Me: Ok, never mind. Different generation!

How sad. They don't know who F4 is? They probably thought that F4 was a robot or something.

It shows how old we are already. These young teens probably do not know who Boyzone, Westlife, Spice Girls or Backstreet Boys are.

Soon, we'll be hearing Spice Girls on Gold 90.5 FM. Ha.

But then again, I don't consider myself old because I actually keep updated about what's on the charts by listening to 987fm. So ya, I know who is Taylor Swift, Demi Lovato, Jonas Brothers...

Okay okay, I know, maybe I am deluding myself! :P

***
I thank God for friends who organise online sprees. They make online shopping so much more fun and help to take away the cumbersome administrative stuff!
I just realise Threadless tees are soooo nice! I love the graphics (:

There is no blog title to this post because there are so many things in my mind waiting to be written, or rather, typed out.

Many things happened this week. I was busy and slightly lethargic (it's sleep deficit) but at the same time, strangely aware of my surrondings and my thoughts. You know how some people are caught up with being busy and they become oblivious to everything around them? But for me, I wasn't oblivious. I was busy, but not ignorant or unaware.

Here are the thoughts for this week..

#1 I have read and heard how Facebook is just too much of a superficial social networking utility. Some people just add other people whom they would not even call friends.

But for me, I love Facebook. I am not going to criticise people who add acquaintances just to increase their number of "friends". I don't do that, but when acquaintances add me, I just accept it, in hope that we can probably become friends.

Now back to why I love FB. This website helps me to keep updated about the things that are happening in my family. I feel that FB has allowed my cousins and me to be closer even when they are in other parts of the world and even when we don't meet up often.

Through FB, I know how my little nephew Iggy is growing to be like, I know my cousin just went for a triathlon, I know that another of my cousin in Auckland recently had a gathering. We share memories (baby photos, to be exact) and we comment and laugh at our past. I feel close to them.

And when we really do meet up, we would joke about what we wrote and did on FB. It is a pity that seemingly close virtual friendships don't translate into close friendships in reality but for me, kinship felt more real because of FB.

#2 I realise I like advertising, especially the really smart ones. Here's one that I watched in lecture this week. It's entitled Mr. W.




And here is the one I did with Denise and Van for our faux personal events company, Cherie Moments. Our advertising strategy is to distribute mineral water with this customised label to executives and professionals (our target market). We figured that no one takes flyers anymore so we will distribute chilled mineral water bottles to them during lunchtime. Who can resist, especially in hot, hot Singapore?



#3 I just finished Anne Rice's novel "Christ the Lord - Out of Egypt". Anne Rice can safely say that she has converted another fan to her works - ME! She portrayed little Jesus as such a bright, young and innocent boy but at the same time, with such deep wisdom for his age. The way she wrote, I can almost imagine myself breathing the dust of Bethehem.

If you all know, Anne Rice is famous for her vampire novels. But when she began to embrace her faith in God again in 2002, she began to explore the beginning of Christianity and the divinely human nature of Jesus.

She wrote in a first-person account, meaning, the protagonist was little Jesus himself. I could almost feel Jesus. So human. So real but at the same time, lies his essence of being God.

Here's an excerpt towards the end of the book. Here is little Jesus, at around 8 years old, grappling with his birth.

I looked up at the first few stars coming through the twilight. Born to die, I thought. Yes, born to die. Why else would I be born of a woman? Why else would I be flesh and blood if it wasn't to die? The pain was terrible I didn't think I could bear it...

When will the angels fill up the sky with singing so that I can see them? When will angels come to me in my dreams?...

A quiet fell over me, just when I thought my heart would burst.

The answer came as if from the earth itself, as if from the stars, and the soft grass, and the nearby trees, and the purring of the evening.

I wasn't sent here to find angels! I wasn't here to dream of them. I wasn't sent here to hear them sing! I was sent here to be alive. To breathe and sweat and thirst and sometimes cry.

And everything that happened to me, everything both great and small, was something I had to learn! There was room for it in the infinite mind of the Lord and I had to seek the lesson in it, no matter how hard it was to find.

It was so simple, so beautiful...

Oh, yes, I would grow up and there would come a time when I would leave Nazareth, surely. I would go out into the world and do what it was I was meant to do. Yes. But for now? All was clear. My fear was gone.

It seemed the whole world was holding me. Why had I ever thought I was alone? I was in the embrace of the earth, of those who loved me no matter what they thought or understood, of the very stars.

"Father," I said. "I am your child."

I was so touched. Yes, Jesus was like you and me, filled with struggles about what we are going to be in life. But eventually, when little Jesus knew, it was so beautiful. That last line just made tears well up in my eyes.

Hmm... this has been a long post but I feel so happy that I can share my thoughts with you all.

I probably will be very busy again next week (project meetings, exam revision and a 2000-word film review waiting for me to complete!) but well, I'll just live each day on its own and trust that God will bring me through everything!

Recently, Mom has been buying a lot of fruits for the family.

I love fruits, especially those that are really bright-coloured - like cherries, strawberries, kiwis and Fuji apples. Sweet fruits are God's gifts.

Bet Adam and Eve had fun plucking various fruits from Eden and enjoying them free of charge.

This is what I ate last night. There were rock melons, kiwis and Fuji apples. Previous nights, I had mango as well. I enjoy my daily portion of fruits and also my daily dose of ODJ (Our Daily Journey), my sweet spiritual food.

Thank God for ODJ because I feel this book is so ministering. I feel God speaking to me every time I read it. I really look forward to QT with Jesus every day now (:

Facebook is so ubiquitous that everyone I see switching on their laptops for lectures are FB-ing, commenting and tagging on photos.

Can't deny that this is a social phenomenon. Facebook, undeniably has such immense power to influence and connect. Unlike social networking sites like Friendster (so secondary school. *shudders*) and Plaxo (so work-based. *yawns*), Facebook is for all people across ages. I see my professors, my 11 year-old cousin and even some people's mothers on FB!

What exactly made FB so popular?

Probably because it allows you to see both the professional and personal side of the person. You see the professional side of the person all the time in real life but FB lets you see how their friends react to them and thus, it allows you to guess what their personal life is like.
It is interesting!

Also, there are so many quizzes and games for the online voyeur in you to idle time away.
I laughed out loud today when I saw Vanessa's Facebook's quiz reveal that her real age was 120 years old (!!!!). How exactly they came up with it, I have no idea.

The quizzes and notes featured on Facebook are random but admit it, most of us find it fascinating to look at what others have to write about themselves and what those Facebook quizzes say about them.

FB is like a blog, albeit easier to update (with those one-liners about how you are feeling), more far-reaching and to some extent, more scandalous.
Weird, ugly, _____(insert your own ugly word) pictures that you will not post on your own blog may be tagged on FB by your friends and family.
And there, your unglamorous side will be showcased, without your consent. Before you can untag, many other people may have already seen the pictures.

Facebook is definitely here to stay, just so to satisfy our inner kaypohs...

Have you had someone who loved you so much that you feel warm and fuzzy, and even to the extent of being grateful because no one has loved you this much? All this despite the fact that you have hurt him/her countless times.

Last morning, I had this warm and fuzzy feeling that welled up deep in my soul. It felt so good.

The secret?

I read Psalm 103:8-14. It was about knowing God as a selfless Lover.

The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
slow to anger, abounding in love.

He will not always accuse,
nor will he harbor his anger forever;

he does not treat us as our sins deserve
or repay us according to our iniquities.

For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
so great is his love for those who fear him;

as far as the east is from the west,
so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

As a father has compassion on his children,
so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;

for he knows how we are formed,
he remembers that we are dust.

(Italics for emphasis - my own)

Maybe because I have studied Shakespeare's play "Measure For Measure" before.. In the play, an appropriate punishment was advocated to be meted out for a crime, that's why I was particularly moved that God does not treat us as our sins deserve.

Our justice system tells us that we ought to be punished according to the seriousness of the crime too.
Murdered someone? Death penalty
Trafficked drugs? Death penalty
Committed rape? Painful strokes of cane and decades of jail term

But God's justice is tempered with mercy (just like what Shakespeare was trying to bring out in "Measure for Measure") for He knows and "remembers that we are dust" (mere imperfect humans).

If God were to treat me according to my sins, I think my life will be totally screwed up.

But no... He understands that I am merely dust, temporal, imperfect, so He overlooked many things, as long as I fear Him as God.

How many times have I been punished because of the things I did?

I remember I was made to kneel on the floor for half and hour because I refused to go to school in K2. I was scolded badly by my dad because for my Primary One Chinese exam, I scored a mere 71 due to careless mistakes.

But here, God is telling me He does not punish me according to the things I've done, contrary to what the world shows us. From that moment on, I felt so loved.

Such unconditional love... It feels so good, and the best part is, everyone and anyone can experience it if you're willing to open your heart to receive His love.

BBQ family dinner gathering (Fri)+ No Food for Thought Camp (Sat) + Sunday piano duty for service (Sun morning) + One Love meeting (Sun evening)= insanely packed weekend

I am surprised I survived, especially when I actually woke up refreshed after the sleep on hard floor in my church's sub-hall, and could still be alert for my piano duty this morning! God's ability to make me regenerate amazes me! God is truly real and he wants the best for His children to worship him. I mean, how many times have I woke up feeling rested in a church youth camp?
None.
But this time round, I did.

Thank you God!

Bobbi Brown and me
Just this recent Wednesday, Yue and I went for a Bobbi Brown makeup workshop.

I know nuts about makeup. A look at my disasterous prom photos would prove it. I mean, I'm turning 22 this year, so I guess it's high time I know something about face paint, eh, I mean makeup. So when I knew about it through Prisci, with my mom's support, I went for it.

The pink room - just like it's meant for Barbie dolls

The canapes by Bakerzin served before we began the workshop. I like the cup of tomato soup. Warm and comforting.

Brushes and more brushes for the eyes, face, cheeks, lips. It's like an art class.


Dab here, dab there. So troublesome but it's quite fun.


End of class. The makeup artist who guided us throughout the class helped us to take a picture when we are finally done. Oooh.

Lord, the worship we bring
Is more than songs that we sing
It’s a reflection of our ever-changing lives
The best we have to offer

We don’t just lift up our hands
Lord, we lift up our lives
For we know that You are worthy of our praise
To You our lifesongs raise

- Father, Spirit, Jesus by Casting Crowns

I was listening to this song on my MP4 on my way home from school just now and the lyrics caught my ears.

Ever since I began reading Purpose-Driven Life again this year, I'm reminded to think of worshipping our Lord as a lifestyle, and not just singing songs and lifting our hands in church. Worshipping God includes even trusting God in every little detail of my life. That's worship too.

Life has too many uncertainties (eg. my posting of HPAP) but I trust God to open doors to the right opportunities, and that I will have the wisdom to catch them!

In yesterday's lecture, Prof Kang mentioned that she tried to be gender-neutral while raising her two young little boys. So she bought them cooking sets to play.

They played them but soon, they were asking for Power Rangers. She pointed out that her boys are probably influenced by their school mates and the media, despite her attempts to not be gender-biased when buying toys.

This led to think what sort of toys I had when I was younger. I had a great childhood in the early 1990s.

When I was still a child, I was given toys, playmates (eh, not Playboy kind!) to play with and loads of imagination to run wild.

I had cooking sets. I learned how to ride a bicycle when I was 8 or 9 years old. I went for swimming classes. I had Barbie dolls (no Ken dolls though I always wanted to buy it). I had frequent fun stayovers at Angie's old place at Hougang. I collected and bought many Sailormoon stuff (dolls, stickers, cards... you don't know how much i like them!). I bought many comic books and fiction like Casper, Richie Rich Archie & Friends, Enid Blyton's and Roald Dahl's and voraciously read them once them were fresh in my hands.

I played make-believe games like being a doctor, being a daughter (to Sarah - my younger sister! Sarah always played my mother -_-"), being a pastor (only in swimming pools when we tried to baptise one another), being a traffic warden and being a driver.

When I played Doctor, we would buy titbits and sweets to use as medicine. Blood in a packet was actually F&N Cherryade in a plastic bag, pasted on the wall by masking tape. Yep that was blood.

That's why I was creative when I was much younger, until higher education came. It dumbed my creativity.

Okay, I shall not digress. But yes, today, as I was talking to Denise, we talked about the things we played when I was younger and we realise that we were all playing with toys that were typically for girls (I hated toys that required building. So yea, Lego blocks were mostly used as food in my cooking games). Then we suddenly talked about Polly Pocket.

Polly Pocket now is produced by Mattel and they're big, just like regular dolls. They cannot even fit into the pockets! It defeats the purpose of being called Polly POCKET!

The versions I played with were produced by Bluebird in the early 90s and they were small and compact. Easy to bring around for hours of fun.

I found these pictures online and these 2 are the exact ones I had! Look at the cross-sectional Polly Pocket dollhouses. You can make the tiny plastic dolls go up and down the house. The mini plastic dolls were about 1cm long.

Strictly not for those with thick fingers (ie. boys' fingers).

I didn't know this Polly Pocket was actually in an European (Parisian to be exact) setting, until now! This fitted well in my palm when I closed it. It came with a miniature dog too.

I remember this one is slightly bigger than the blue one because it was a castle. This one would actually light up! When you close it, it's in a heart shape. If I didn't remember wrongly, this was a Christmas present from Angie's mom.


Oh! The more I say it, the more excited I become! They were absolute joy to play with. Together with Angie and Sarah's Polly Pockets, we always formed neighbourhoods,visiting one another's tiny plastic dolls.

Come to think about it, the plastic dolls were really dangerous because they were really small. Tiny. Minute. Really tiny.
Thank goodness they haven't been stuck in my ears and nose before!

What did you all play in your childhood? Do share!

Runny nose. Check.
Followed by blocked nose. Check.
Itchy throaty cough. Check.
Body aches. Check.
Headache. Check.
A research paper proposal due tomorrow. Check.

Being sick is not fun. It's even more not fun because I have to rush a proposal due tomorrow.

I seriously think why I fall sick so often is because I lack exercise.
I will go cycling more often and exercise away my tendency to fall sick. Really.

But thank God for Alice's sms today. This little girl always never fail to brighten up my day!

Okay, now back to finishing my proposal!

I am still in school as I'm writing this. Everything is calm. There is no sign of hysteria but just a heightened sense of anxiety and hush whisperings.

Remember the case about the Korean college guy shooting dead his own school mates in Virginia Tech about 2 years ago?

Today, NTU has its own version.

Van, Denise, Cecilia and I were on our way to Basic Media Writing lecture at Communication Studies School at 1130am when we peered down over the ledge (we were walking from the School of EEE) and saw many many police cars. There were also cameramen and reporters.

What was going on?

We didn't know then but it seemed like something big.

I was guessing then that there may be a murder case or something. Ooooh the intrigue.

Little did I know I was partly right.

Apparently, a 4th year (final year) engineering student had stabbed his supervising professor and then slitted his own wrists and jumped down from the 5th level. The student died.

Violence in the school ground is traumatising, especially since a varsity should be the epitome of clear-headed rationality. Such an irrational act undermines a college's reputation.

So now Singapore has its own "Virgina Tech shootout". We call it Nanyang Tech stabbing.

Was it stress?
Was it dissatisfaction with the supervisor?
Was it a case of neurotic malfunction?

I don't know yet. But it really reminds us to keep a clear and healthy mind. Don't indulge in depressing thoughts!